I Miss You by Pat Thomas is our “go to” resource in explaining the important facts and beliefs surrounding death to children from ages 3 to 12. We are certain that this book should be in the hands of any parent or teacher explaining a death to a child and recommend it as a resource at least once a week. Pictures and questions at the bottom of each page provide for wonderful dialogue with adult and child.
When children don’t have the full picture of how their loved one died, their brains will fill in the gaps – and the narrative they create won’t be 100% accurate! I Know I Made it Happen by Lynn Blackburn addresses the fears that many children experience after a loss of any sort, wondering if something they did played a role. This resource normalizes feelings of remorse while also teaching children that their thoughts, feelings, and wishes don’t actually cause bad things to happen, all while encouraging art as a form of expression.
When you are given the opportunity to explain death to young children, it can help immensely to have a resource in your hands that takes the words out of your mouth and puts them right on the page! “Honey Bear Died” by Jennifer Melvin uses realistic, age-appropriate language to explain to children ages 3-5 that someone in their world has died. This wonderful book invites you to view they natural ways that our children mourn, and how to support them on their healing journey.
One of the saddest days for our Olivia’s House York center was when we learned that our beautiful weeping cherry willow tree—the one that provided shade and security over our Healing Garden of Hope— had died and needed to be cut down. “Gentle Willow” by Joyce Mills tells a similar story from the perspective of Amanda the Squirrel, whose best friend, the Gentle Willow, is dying. The magic of the forest helps both Amanda and Gentle Willow learn about the changes that come with death, and how to keep their spiritual relationship alive even when the physical form has died. We’re not crying, you’re crying!
We use words like “here” and “there” all the time, but when they relate to death and loss, these words can suddenly take on a new meaning. In Ben Keckler’s From Here to There, we follow the story of a young boy, Chris, as he learns to cope with his father’s death while exploring the journey of life. As you read, you will find “question marks” hidden throughout the beautiful illustrations, symbolizing Chris’s goal of weaving loss into the narrative of his life.
When someone dies, it can be confusing to tell children that we “lost” them. Finding Grandpa Everywhere by John Hodge tells the story of a young boy who is told “we lost Grandpa,” and now is on the search to find him! As the boy realizes he won’t find Grandpa in a physical form, he also finds that there are plenty of memories to be found, and Grandpa truly is “everywhere!”
When someone we love dies, our faith can be tested, and this is true for children and adults alike! In Kathleen Fucci’s Emily Lost Someone She Loved, the reader joins Emily on her journey of loss after her mother dies. In this heartwarming quest for healing, Emily finds that the love of her mother and her faith have been an invisible support underneath her all along!
The rollercoaster of life’s emotions takes us on a never-ending ride of thrill, tension, excitement, and release. Glenn Ringtved’s children’s book, “Cry, Heart, But Never Break” shows the reader that even children can understand the concept that our range of emotions is important, and we can’t experience happiness without also experiencing sadness. By personifying the feelings of Joy, Grief, Delight, and Sorrow, this resource will help children to begin their own journey of understanding the deeper meanings behind life’s tougher experiences.
In one of our favorite books, City Dog, Country Frog by Mo Willems, we see the formation of an unlikely friendship between a city-living dog and a country-dwelling frog. Each winter and spring, they meet in their respective locations to play games with each other. One spring, Country Frog is moving a little slower than usual, so the pair decide to play “remembering games.” When Country Frog stops showing up at their usual spot, City Dog learns how to mourn and cope with losing his friend. Luckily, Country Chipmunk shows up to start a new friendship and remind City Dog that friendship knows no bounds!
When Chippy Chipmunk’s best friend Pickle Dies, Chippy goes through the natural bereavement process. Chippy’s friends join him on his bereavement journey to share coping skills and memories of Pickle that will last a lifetime!
